Can't meditate? Go nine rounds to get the practice you want
Photo by Flickr user Daquella manera
Often we give up when it comes to changing behavior. After all, the old way has worked, sort of. In my psychotherapy practice, I’ve often observed the following with couples:
One person expresses a desire, e.g. "I want to visit my mother this weekend.” The other counters, “I need to get yard work done.” The conversation stops there. I tell them to go nine rounds, to not give up, to find a solution that works for each person.
I hear the same pattern with meditating. “I can’t sit still.” “I meditate while I’m jogging.”
Usually the feeling of I-can’t-meditate (on a regular basis, in the morning, sitting down, etc.) is because of a struggle, like the couple arguing - two sides wanting conflicting things. Instead of giving up, listen carefully to the different parts.
Perhaps you have a voice inside that says, “I deserve to run when I get home to get rid of pent up energy,” or “I want to perseverate about what’s bothering me.” Okay, give that part its due. What about the other part that says, “I need peace and quiet,” “I need to let go of the tension in my body?” See what happens when you let each part of you have a strong voice. Go some rounds until you find the compromise that meets even the conflicting needs.
Of course, there are days that meditation doesn’t fit into our busy lives (I overslept this morning!), but the more we listen to our need to be quiet and relax, the better chance we have of actually doing it. I think I’ll go meditate right now
As a mental health professional, an owner of a fitness studio, a writer and a wife, mother and grandmother, I have found meditation to be helpful in every aspect of my life. To find out about my meditation classes this fall, contact me at email@example.com or check out my websites: susanscottmorales.com and bodiesinbalancefitness.com.