Ypsilanti woman to shave head to raise funds to fight childhood cancer

Kate Stroud, center, will have her head shaved on March 17 as part of the St. Baldrick's Foundation to raise money and awareness for childhood cancer. With her in her Ypsilanti home are 9-year-old son Sam and 5-year-old daughter Ella.

Janet Miller | For AnnArbor.com

Stroud has a friend, Emily MacBeth, who lost her daughter to non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma when she was a toddler. She is organizing the event in a Commerce bar, an hour northeast of Ann Arbor. 

Stroud, the mother of a 5-year-old and 9-year old, said she wanted to raise money and awareness of childhood cancer. She hopes to raise $3,000, and had $1,700 in pledges as of a week ago.

In early February, Stroud started a blog chronicling her journey to going bald. She wrote about learning of MacBeth's ordeal:

"My head was swimming, my eyes were streaming (I was actually heaving, weeping a little a one point). This wonderful woman, Emily, has lived my nightmare. I cannot fathom the strength needed to get through something like that. To get out of bed, to breathe, just to be would be excruciatingly painful. I can only imagine, although I try not to for too long. Life is precious. Every moment is precious and important."

Stroud's hair has always been a security blanket of sorts. The shortest it’s been has been mid-neck, and that was when her children were babies, and it kept them from pulling it.

Stroud is trying to raise money through mass e-mails, her blog and tapping everyone she knows. Her 93-year-old grandmother in an assisted living facility in Novi is even soliciting donations from other residents.

Being bald will create new opportunities to raise funds, Stroud said, as people are sure to ask about it. 

“I will be wearing a button and will be carrying (donation) sheets with me at all times,” she said.

Still, there’s trepidation. 

“I was nervous to tell my family, nervous about how they will see me, nervous about how they will feel,” Stroud said. 

Despite trying to rationalize it, gender stereotypes are strong, even with her young children: Boys have short hair, girls have long hair, and women are not bald. There’s also some fear. 

“Is my head going to be funny-shaped?” she said.

And there’s the issue of going out in public. Two days after her head is shaved, Stroud has a three-day training workshop in her hometown of Birmingham.

“I’m going to be bald in Birmingham for three days,” Stroud said. “That’s nerve-wracking. There will be an adjustment.”

She’s also on call for a birth around the same time. She'll be the birthing coach at a local hospital. Four weeks later, she has a family wedding. She’s bracing herself for hard moments. 

“Someone told me in an e-mail they sent me about how their daughter (who has lost her hair during caner treatment) got teased so much, they had to pull her out of school,” Stroud said.

She wrote about her worries on the blog: "Will I feel ugly? I will feel self-conscious and scrutinize my eyebrows more than usual? But I know I am beautiful."

Her hair will not only be buzzed short. A razor will leave Stroud without even stubble.

“It’s part of solidarity,” Stroud said. “Why do people run marathons and not just two miles? It will make it more significant.”

It will also make it drafty. Stroud isn’t sure how she will protect her head. She doesn’t want to wear a scarf, like many cancer patients do. She said that would feel disrespectful. 

“But will it be cold at night? I sleep by a window. Do I wear a nightcap?” 

A friend has knitted her a hat, and her grandmother gave her an extra cap she no longer uses. Someone suggested she stick a bow on her head for the wedding, an idea she said she’ll resist.

Stroud said she wants to document the project with weekly photos, which will be posted on her blog. In addition to raising funds and awareness, Stroud said she hopes to learn something about herself. “I hope it will let me let go of some of my insecurities,” she said.

She also hopes to have some fun with it. “For the wedding, I may wear my red dress and black heels and go all out,” Stroud said. “And hopefully raise more money too.”

Stroud tries to put her worries in perspective on the blog: "It is hair, it will grow back and most important I am lucky that "I am able to make the choice to lose my hair. A choice that many do not have."

Janet Miller is a freelance writer for AnnArbor.com. Reach the news desk at news@annarbor.com or 734-623-2530.